How to Overcome The Fear of Rejection
Feeling uncomfortable in the stomach, cold sweaty palm, trembling of legs, losing the ability to think correctly when approaching a girl? Hate yourself for not able to overcome this problem? Oh, please do not feel so. Believe me, you are not the only one facing this problem. In fact, this is a very common problem in man. Everyone is just like you, not willing to admit it openly, having the fear of being laughed and mocked by others. But there is absolutely nothing wrong for feeling so.
Well approaching a girl, asking her out for a date isn’t really as scary as you thought. For all you may know, the girl is just as or even more nervous than you. Some guys are born with the natural flair with girls while some guys are just born shy. But that doesn’t mean that they can’t do as good. In fact, shy men are who most girls are looking for. It is really a pity that all the good men are hiding up leaving the girls with not much of a choice but to hang out with the jerks.
So how can you overcome your fear? Well, this is something that I can’t help you. You simply just got to make that first step, that very first attempt. Still feeling too nervous? Ok, perhaps we should take things a little slower. There is actually no urgent need for you to just walk up to a girl and ask her out for a date. Too sudden? You might just scare her off. But please, don’t take for ages before someone else try to cut in the queue. I don’t suppose you memorized your whole school textbook before going for your exams? It’s the same thing, you don’t need to wait till you fully overcome your fear before you approach a girl.
Well anyway, I should believe that the both of you are at least like normal friends? Classmates? Colleagues or? Whatever it is, grab any chance to get closer to her. Too shy to strike a conversation with her? Look her in the eyes, drop her a nice warm smile. Make her notice you, make her remember you, let her know that you exist! You be surprised, your eyes can actually work more wonders than to words at times. All these will eventually boost the chance of success when approaching her at a later date. She will naturally feel more comfortable with you than to be approached by a total stranger.
Ok, now that you have done all of what you can do, no more excuses from you! Stop hiding up, it’s time to make your move. Now, I want you to follow very closely after me. Take a deep breathe, gather all your courage. She is sitting all alone on the bench under the tree. Slowly and steady, you walk towards her. Yes, step by step getting nearer and nearer. She turns and saw you approaching. Remember, she has seen you before, she knows who you are. Now look her in the eyes, smile at her. She greets you with her nice gentle smile. One final step, you stop in front of her. “Hi, what a coincides to see you here”, you say to her in a nice, friendly voice. “Busy with anything now? How about a little coffee together?” Smiling so sweetly at you she replies teasingly, “Your treat? Sure why not?”
Hey you still with me? Ha sorry, was just trying to play a little game of hypnosis with you. Did I fare horribly? Well anyway, it would really be so lovely if things were as what I had described? Why not? Why couldn’t it be possible? You see, the problem with most people is that they always tend to create negative thoughts; creating an image of failure, an image of been rejected in their mind before things actually happen. Subconsciously, they have actually rejected themselves before anyone else could even reject them and yes, the likely chances is they will fail. Just like in soccer matches, when David Beckham scores from his spectacular free kick? If at the moment before he even lifts his feet, he was creating the image of ballooning away the ball over the goal post in his mind, you think he will score? So why not picture things the other way round, telling your mind; yourself that you are going to make it? It will definitely boosts your confidence and the chance of a success.
Hope you are feeling more comfortable and less nervous now? But well, the chance of being rejected is nonetheless always still there. So what should happen if you really fail? You should learn to graciously accept the rejection. It is perfectly alright, my friend. At least you know you have tried? You finally pluck out that courage? There is nothing to feel ashamed of. Picture it this way; you are the one being approached instead. Approached by a girl that is not of your type. You would have rejected her as well, wouldn’t you? But would you make fun of her, laugh and mock at her? I should believe not? Instead, you would have felt happy and thankful to her; it is just a pity that she is not your type of girl? That is exactly how the girl whom rejected you would have felt too; it is just a pity that you are not her type of guy. Nobody would be laughing at you, probably they would be admiring you for your courage instead.
Though you might be rejected but believe me, once there is a first time the rest will just come naturally. You might be sad and disappointed but once you get yourself back, you would have remembered that it wasn’t as scary what you had thought. You would have probably already overcome a great deal of your fear. It is just like the first time driving out on your own after getting your license. For some unlucky ones, meeting up with a little accident. But that doesn’t stop them from driving on? In fact, experiences were gained. So was confidence along the way, driving more smoothly, stepping even harder on the accelerator?
Well, rejection is part and parcel of life. It is not only in love that you get rejected. In life, you are faced with more rejections. Rejections from your work? Your boss? Your business associates? Even your own family? But that won’t stop you from moving on in life?
Last but not least, there is one thing you have to accept. The fact that, you are a man! It is afterall still the guy’s job to do the asking. You just gotta do it and I am sure you can do it yeah?
bio = Rick ValensStaff Writer for http://www.loveletterbox.com , Love Relationship Discussion Forum
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Fate?
Love Advice: Let Fate Decide?
One of the most commonly asked questions, What is Love? What is its exact definition? Well, there can never be a definite answer. Everyone got his or her own answer to it. To some it can be really simple while to others, it can get really complicated. But one definite thing that is for sure, everybody needs love. It is a basic human need; we are not born into this world to be alone. It has always been our natural instinct as human to reach out to people, to be with and accepted by others. Consciously or subconsciously, everyone is searching and waiting for that special someone to appear in his or her life.
But where and when will this special someone appear? For all you may know, he or she could be just nearby or even just beside you. It all depends on fate a lot would say. Fate? Well fate is again, something that cannot be explained, something that is always so amazing. Think about it. Among the millions and millions of people who could be out there, why is it that you had somehow met your friends to later become the best of friends? Got retrenched, feeling so terrible and disappointed but to later find your love among your new colleagues in your new job? Life has just suddenly become so beautiful?Well, this is indeed a very true encounter of a friend of mine. Hmm. thinking about it, isn’t there also kind of a fate between you and me that you are actually reading this article right now? Everything is like all so miraculously arranged, having a reason behind every event that happened.
Do you believe in fate? Personally I definitely do. But again, are we really going to be just sitting around doing nothing, waiting for fate to just come by? Well, I wouldn’t think so. If you are not going to help yourself, who is going to? Fate has always been around us. As long as we are in places where there are people, presence it may be. Many at times, it had actually been there but somehow we just didn’t realized and cherished it when it was there. Sad to know of it, isn’t it so? Well, sometimes we were just too obsessed with our works, dreams and nevertheless too high an expectation that we missed to see it, to cherish that someone who was all along just beside us. It is only too late to realize it now, an opportunity won’t drop by twice. Your happiness lies in your own hand, don’t live your life a regret. I am sure you wanna have a life that is so full of fond memories than with tons of regrets, don’t you? Think about it.
Let us just open up ourselves shall we? Everyday is a beautiful day, stop burying yourself with that tons of endless work. Make time for yourself, reach out, make more friends, make new friends, widen up your social circle, live a balanced healthy social life. Make life enjoyable; you will see things in a more different way. You might be going, “Hmm. why is it that all this while, I have never noticed that she is actually such a pretty girl.” Well, in fact this is how true love comes about. It doesn’t always have to be a love at first sight, to be attracted to his or her physical look. Sometimes it is through an initial friendship, enjoying the companion of one another that along time, you discover the beauty of his or her inner human qualities, unknowingly falling in love with the person. Wouldn’t this be a more beautiful and meaningful love than to a love at first sight?
Remember, love has always been a game ever awaiting your participation. Just as in life, it is a game of chance; if you never try you can never win. Well if you did not find your love today, be disappointed do not. It is just like missing the last boat leaving the dock. There will always be another one to pick you up the next morning? And always will there be.
Now, another boat is getting ready to set off soon. To the land of great romance and opportunities it will sail. The question is, will you board it?
bio = Rick ValensStaff Writer for http://www.loveletterbox.com , Love Relationship Discussion Forum
One of the most commonly asked questions, What is Love? What is its exact definition? Well, there can never be a definite answer. Everyone got his or her own answer to it. To some it can be really simple while to others, it can get really complicated. But one definite thing that is for sure, everybody needs love. It is a basic human need; we are not born into this world to be alone. It has always been our natural instinct as human to reach out to people, to be with and accepted by others. Consciously or subconsciously, everyone is searching and waiting for that special someone to appear in his or her life.
But where and when will this special someone appear? For all you may know, he or she could be just nearby or even just beside you. It all depends on fate a lot would say. Fate? Well fate is again, something that cannot be explained, something that is always so amazing. Think about it. Among the millions and millions of people who could be out there, why is it that you had somehow met your friends to later become the best of friends? Got retrenched, feeling so terrible and disappointed but to later find your love among your new colleagues in your new job? Life has just suddenly become so beautiful?Well, this is indeed a very true encounter of a friend of mine. Hmm. thinking about it, isn’t there also kind of a fate between you and me that you are actually reading this article right now? Everything is like all so miraculously arranged, having a reason behind every event that happened.
Do you believe in fate? Personally I definitely do. But again, are we really going to be just sitting around doing nothing, waiting for fate to just come by? Well, I wouldn’t think so. If you are not going to help yourself, who is going to? Fate has always been around us. As long as we are in places where there are people, presence it may be. Many at times, it had actually been there but somehow we just didn’t realized and cherished it when it was there. Sad to know of it, isn’t it so? Well, sometimes we were just too obsessed with our works, dreams and nevertheless too high an expectation that we missed to see it, to cherish that someone who was all along just beside us. It is only too late to realize it now, an opportunity won’t drop by twice. Your happiness lies in your own hand, don’t live your life a regret. I am sure you wanna have a life that is so full of fond memories than with tons of regrets, don’t you? Think about it.
Let us just open up ourselves shall we? Everyday is a beautiful day, stop burying yourself with that tons of endless work. Make time for yourself, reach out, make more friends, make new friends, widen up your social circle, live a balanced healthy social life. Make life enjoyable; you will see things in a more different way. You might be going, “Hmm. why is it that all this while, I have never noticed that she is actually such a pretty girl.” Well, in fact this is how true love comes about. It doesn’t always have to be a love at first sight, to be attracted to his or her physical look. Sometimes it is through an initial friendship, enjoying the companion of one another that along time, you discover the beauty of his or her inner human qualities, unknowingly falling in love with the person. Wouldn’t this be a more beautiful and meaningful love than to a love at first sight?
Remember, love has always been a game ever awaiting your participation. Just as in life, it is a game of chance; if you never try you can never win. Well if you did not find your love today, be disappointed do not. It is just like missing the last boat leaving the dock. There will always be another one to pick you up the next morning? And always will there be.
Now, another boat is getting ready to set off soon. To the land of great romance and opportunities it will sail. The question is, will you board it?
bio = Rick ValensStaff Writer for http://www.loveletterbox.com , Love Relationship Discussion Forum
Sure Ways for your girl
5 Surefire Ways to Arouse Your Woman
As there are different types of women, there are different ways to arouse them as well. If you have been in a bit of a slump here are some quick ways to rev up your love life:
1) Dress in a suit and take her out to a romantic dinner. Women love men in suits and almost every man looks good in one. The soft candle light of a romantic restaurant combined with a good wine will put her in the mood to get closer, as well.
2) Work out together. Workouts release pheromones that heighten attraction between couples. Get sweaty together then clean up with some dirty fun in the shower.
3) Take a bath together. Fill the tub with some scented oils or bath salts and toss in some rose petals. Play romantic music and light some candles. She will feel pampered and grateful. Let her relax for a few minutes then slip in with her. There is plenty of opportunity for sexy contact while you clean each other.
4) Roleplay can keep your relationship and sex life reved up for years.
Ex. My boyfriend will dress up like a handyman and really get into the act with accent and tools. He comes over and offers to lend a helping hand around the house. He offers a truly helping hand and I tip him extremely well.
5) Practice erotic massage. Either take a class together or get a video or book and practice on each other. This is a great way to get both of you relaxed and heated up.bio = Caterina Christakos is a published author and dating coach. For your free seduction mini course go to: www.what-women-want.com
As there are different types of women, there are different ways to arouse them as well. If you have been in a bit of a slump here are some quick ways to rev up your love life:
1) Dress in a suit and take her out to a romantic dinner. Women love men in suits and almost every man looks good in one. The soft candle light of a romantic restaurant combined with a good wine will put her in the mood to get closer, as well.
2) Work out together. Workouts release pheromones that heighten attraction between couples. Get sweaty together then clean up with some dirty fun in the shower.
3) Take a bath together. Fill the tub with some scented oils or bath salts and toss in some rose petals. Play romantic music and light some candles. She will feel pampered and grateful. Let her relax for a few minutes then slip in with her. There is plenty of opportunity for sexy contact while you clean each other.
4) Roleplay can keep your relationship and sex life reved up for years.
Ex. My boyfriend will dress up like a handyman and really get into the act with accent and tools. He comes over and offers to lend a helping hand around the house. He offers a truly helping hand and I tip him extremely well.
5) Practice erotic massage. Either take a class together or get a video or book and practice on each other. This is a great way to get both of you relaxed and heated up.bio = Caterina Christakos is a published author and dating coach. For your free seduction mini course go to: www.what-women-want.com
Dating Works
A guide to dating
People in long-term relationships, whether they are married or dating, often complain about getting into a rut. Your relationship may have started off with the great burst of passion and excitement but perhaps it began to wane because life is busy and work can where you out by the end of the day.
If you’re in a dating relationship that seems to be in a rut, or wonder why you can’t keep a long term relationship exciting anymore, perhaps you need to go back to the beginning. That doesn’t mean you need to break up with your current partner and find someone new, it means you need to refresh the relationship with exciting and spontaneous activities.
When you look back on a period of your life, what is it that you remember? Is it the average day-in, day-out activities? Not likely. It is more likely those fun and spur-of-the-moment times when you did things that were hilarious or scary or new. That’s what it means to go back to the beginning of a relationship, when everything you do is spontaneous and new.
Next time you and your girlfriend or boyfriend are deciding to do something on Friday, don’t settle for dinner-and-a-movie. Do something different! Here are some ideas:
Play paintballRent a classic carGo skydivingHave a picnic
Or surprise your date with something spontaneous:
Start a water fightGo for a romantic boat ride and tip the boatBlindfold your date and take them somewhere they never beenSurprise your date at work just as they’re finishing up for the day
Relationships fail for many reasons. One of the saddest reasons is that people simply drift apart because the other person doesn’t excite them anymore. It doesn’t have to be that you’re your relationship, whether dating or married, can thrive when it is filled with adventures that the two of you share as you build memories together.
You’ll look back on your time together with fondness as you consider the many fun and spontaneous things you did together. But doing those things is a choice. Choose to return to the beginning of your relationship and have fun again!bio = Jeff Lakie is the founder of www.my-adult-dating.info and www.my-personal-ads.info websites providing information on Dating
People in long-term relationships, whether they are married or dating, often complain about getting into a rut. Your relationship may have started off with the great burst of passion and excitement but perhaps it began to wane because life is busy and work can where you out by the end of the day.
If you’re in a dating relationship that seems to be in a rut, or wonder why you can’t keep a long term relationship exciting anymore, perhaps you need to go back to the beginning. That doesn’t mean you need to break up with your current partner and find someone new, it means you need to refresh the relationship with exciting and spontaneous activities.
When you look back on a period of your life, what is it that you remember? Is it the average day-in, day-out activities? Not likely. It is more likely those fun and spur-of-the-moment times when you did things that were hilarious or scary or new. That’s what it means to go back to the beginning of a relationship, when everything you do is spontaneous and new.
Next time you and your girlfriend or boyfriend are deciding to do something on Friday, don’t settle for dinner-and-a-movie. Do something different! Here are some ideas:
Play paintballRent a classic carGo skydivingHave a picnic
Or surprise your date with something spontaneous:
Start a water fightGo for a romantic boat ride and tip the boatBlindfold your date and take them somewhere they never beenSurprise your date at work just as they’re finishing up for the day
Relationships fail for many reasons. One of the saddest reasons is that people simply drift apart because the other person doesn’t excite them anymore. It doesn’t have to be that you’re your relationship, whether dating or married, can thrive when it is filled with adventures that the two of you share as you build memories together.
You’ll look back on your time together with fondness as you consider the many fun and spontaneous things you did together. But doing those things is a choice. Choose to return to the beginning of your relationship and have fun again!bio = Jeff Lakie is the founder of www.my-adult-dating.info and www.my-personal-ads.info websites providing information on Dating
Sorry that Works
Write An Apology To Your Spouse: How to Apologize In a Way That Really Works For You
Being apologetic doesn’t come easily for me. Unfortunately, being inconsiderate and self-centered does. So I realized long ago that my marital survival would depend on two things: 1) learning to apologize and 2) becoming less selfish and more considerate.
It was easier to start with apologies. Over time I got better and better at learning how to apologize. I was amazed at the effect.
First, it was the basic mumbling of, “I’m sorry.” Those two words were remarkable in healing bruised feelings. It was as if I had a license to do what I wanted– as long as I looked sincere and said, “I’m sorry.” It was like having a “Get out of jail free” Monopoly card.
When my apology failed to produce the desired results, I spruced it up. I would put my apology in a tuxedo, and my wife would be so grateful that I would get another reprieve.
Given my personality, I had lots of opportunity to practice making apologies. Ultimately I created a formula. It’s for the bigger offenses or for smaller offenses that you have repeated so often they’ve created a lot of tension with your spouse.
Five Step Formula For a Really Good Apology
1. Describe your offense. This is necessary so your partner knows exactly what you’re apologizing for.2. Describe what you think is the effect on your partner. This display of empathy is comforting to the other person.3. Describe why you did what you did. This reassures your spouse that you’re on top of the problem and reduces their need to nag you about it.4. Describe why you’re interested in changing the offensive behavior. This demonstrates an understanding of the big picture that as couple you’re a team.5. Describe a self imposed penalty for not changing. This one is the clincher. Think of an appropriate penalty for your offensive behavior, and tell it to your spouse. Tell them that if you don’t change you will impose the penalty on yourself. This reassures them that you mean business.
I encourage people to write their apology. Writing it out first or writing it and then giving it to your mate has several advantages:
1. You can collect and refine your thoughts. It is very difficult to think through an apology on the fly, especially if your angry partner is on the offensive.2. You will be heard all the way through. Nobody will interrupt and start yelling at a spouse when they are reading an apology.3. You avoid the hostile questions that often interrupt you when you start speaking the apology. These negative questions have the nasty effect of derailing your good intentions and then you just have another argument which demands another apology.4. You avoid the raised eyebrows and squinting eyes during the apology which just derail you again. (See the last sentence in number 3.)5. It looks like you have given this some serious thought (which might even be true).6. You don’t have to sleep on the couch tonight.
Putting It All Together
1. Honey, I’ve been thinking about your comments that I don’t follow through consistently when I say I’ll do something. I apologize for that.2. Being inconsistent means you can never be sure whether I will follow through or not. I imagine it keeps you on edge and wondering if you should “remind” me or not. If you don’t speak up you run the risk that I won’t follow through and then it is too late to take corrective action. If you do speak up, you run the risk of coming across like a nag.3. I hate to admit it, but when I agree to something, sometimes it’s just to get you off my back. I think, “well, I’ll do it if I get time.” But if it’s something I really don’t want to do, often I simply don’t make the time. I’m also unreliable when my priorities collide with yours–and my priorities too often prevail. This means I really haven’t thought much about us being a true team where we can each count on the other to follow through.4. I actually have some interest in improving my reliability. I would feel more aligned with my higher intentions about being a good partner, and we could probably have more fun together.5. Finally, I want you to get off my back as a policeman to make sure I follow through. Both of us will feel better about that. So when I don’t follow through or give you a timely warning (stuff does happen) then I will work on cleaning the garage the following weekend for at least two hours every time I blow it.
My book, “Tell Me No Lies,” includes some helpful insights about apologies. For more information or to order, visit The Couples Institute.
May all your apologies be little ones.bio = Peter Pearson, Ph.D., and his wife Dr. Ellyn Bader, are founders of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, CA. Since 1984, they have helped people create extraordinary relationships. Authors, speakers, and therapists, they have been featured on over 50 radio and TV programs including “The Today Show” and “CBS Early Morning News.” For more information and to subscribe to their free monthly newsletter, “Love that Lasts,” visit The Couples Institute.
Being apologetic doesn’t come easily for me. Unfortunately, being inconsiderate and self-centered does. So I realized long ago that my marital survival would depend on two things: 1) learning to apologize and 2) becoming less selfish and more considerate.
It was easier to start with apologies. Over time I got better and better at learning how to apologize. I was amazed at the effect.
First, it was the basic mumbling of, “I’m sorry.” Those two words were remarkable in healing bruised feelings. It was as if I had a license to do what I wanted– as long as I looked sincere and said, “I’m sorry.” It was like having a “Get out of jail free” Monopoly card.
When my apology failed to produce the desired results, I spruced it up. I would put my apology in a tuxedo, and my wife would be so grateful that I would get another reprieve.
Given my personality, I had lots of opportunity to practice making apologies. Ultimately I created a formula. It’s for the bigger offenses or for smaller offenses that you have repeated so often they’ve created a lot of tension with your spouse.
Five Step Formula For a Really Good Apology
1. Describe your offense. This is necessary so your partner knows exactly what you’re apologizing for.2. Describe what you think is the effect on your partner. This display of empathy is comforting to the other person.3. Describe why you did what you did. This reassures your spouse that you’re on top of the problem and reduces their need to nag you about it.4. Describe why you’re interested in changing the offensive behavior. This demonstrates an understanding of the big picture that as couple you’re a team.5. Describe a self imposed penalty for not changing. This one is the clincher. Think of an appropriate penalty for your offensive behavior, and tell it to your spouse. Tell them that if you don’t change you will impose the penalty on yourself. This reassures them that you mean business.
I encourage people to write their apology. Writing it out first or writing it and then giving it to your mate has several advantages:
1. You can collect and refine your thoughts. It is very difficult to think through an apology on the fly, especially if your angry partner is on the offensive.2. You will be heard all the way through. Nobody will interrupt and start yelling at a spouse when they are reading an apology.3. You avoid the hostile questions that often interrupt you when you start speaking the apology. These negative questions have the nasty effect of derailing your good intentions and then you just have another argument which demands another apology.4. You avoid the raised eyebrows and squinting eyes during the apology which just derail you again. (See the last sentence in number 3.)5. It looks like you have given this some serious thought (which might even be true).6. You don’t have to sleep on the couch tonight.
Putting It All Together
1. Honey, I’ve been thinking about your comments that I don’t follow through consistently when I say I’ll do something. I apologize for that.2. Being inconsistent means you can never be sure whether I will follow through or not. I imagine it keeps you on edge and wondering if you should “remind” me or not. If you don’t speak up you run the risk that I won’t follow through and then it is too late to take corrective action. If you do speak up, you run the risk of coming across like a nag.3. I hate to admit it, but when I agree to something, sometimes it’s just to get you off my back. I think, “well, I’ll do it if I get time.” But if it’s something I really don’t want to do, often I simply don’t make the time. I’m also unreliable when my priorities collide with yours–and my priorities too often prevail. This means I really haven’t thought much about us being a true team where we can each count on the other to follow through.4. I actually have some interest in improving my reliability. I would feel more aligned with my higher intentions about being a good partner, and we could probably have more fun together.5. Finally, I want you to get off my back as a policeman to make sure I follow through. Both of us will feel better about that. So when I don’t follow through or give you a timely warning (stuff does happen) then I will work on cleaning the garage the following weekend for at least two hours every time I blow it.
My book, “Tell Me No Lies,” includes some helpful insights about apologies. For more information or to order, visit The Couples Institute.
May all your apologies be little ones.bio = Peter Pearson, Ph.D., and his wife Dr. Ellyn Bader, are founders of The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, CA. Since 1984, they have helped people create extraordinary relationships. Authors, speakers, and therapists, they have been featured on over 50 radio and TV programs including “The Today Show” and “CBS Early Morning News.” For more information and to subscribe to their free monthly newsletter, “Love that Lasts,” visit The Couples Institute.
Talk to BED
Learn to Make Small Talk
Do you like making small talk?
Small talk is the name commonly given to the fairly predictable superficial chatter that makes up a large portion of our social encounters.
Neighbors chatting over the fence, strangers speaking to each other in a grocery line, or workers talking at an office party will often engage in the exchange of fairly ritual, routine observations, comments and questions.
Often there is no intent by either party to take the conversation to a deeper level.
Most of the comments and questions tend to be of a fairly trivial sort. For example, a person might say, “I wonder when this heat wave will ever end,” or “That’s a nice dress, where did you get it?”
Other typical small talk dialogue might include basic questions like, “What do you do?” Or “How long have you lived in this neighborhood”?
Small talk often has a bad name. Many people dislike small talk, precisely because it is so mundane and trivial and predictable. It rarely touches on anything important.
It does not lead you deeply into the soul of another. It is conservative and safe. You do not discuss really serious issues like world hunger, or the meaning of life, or the results of a recent scientific breakthrough.
People who are very intellectual or very shy, and those who are socially rebellious, are often unable or unwilling to engage in this sort of chatter, which they consider meaningless and trite.
They long instead to have only intense, meaningful, and soulful exchanges about important matters.
If this is true of you, if you have had nothing but contempt for the very existence of small talk, if you look down with disdain on all who engage in it, it is time to consider revising your opinion.
Small talk, however despicable, however clich?, has an important role to play in initiating, developing, and deepening social connections with other human beings.
Think of small talk as the oil that lubricates the wheels of social interaction. If you see a person regularly, you can use small talk as a way to gradually learn more about each other.
Small talk gives people a low-key, non-threatening way to exchange very basic bits of information with each other.
Through these very tiny, safe, and clich? exchanges that each person offers the other, you can find out what interests you have in common, and whether or not you like the character of the other person.
A complete inability or refusal to engage in small talk can severely limit the overall number of social relationships you develop.
Refusing to engage in some form of small talk will send out the signal that you are not a friendly person, or that you think you are too good to talk with others.
On the other hand, the more often you engage in small talk encounters with others, the more likely it is that you will find people who want to move on to discuss some of the topics that are of more importance to you.
Instead of refusing to play the small talk “game”, why not really make a game out of it? Decide to practice small talk strictly for fun and give yourself points for starting it and keeping it going. Think of small talk as a skill you can develop, and practice working to become better at it. Do it everywhere, and do it often.
Becoming good at small talk will eventually pay off and give you even more opportunities to talk about those things that really matter to you.
You can actually learn to enjoy the light hearted, low key, small talk process, and you may end up liking many of the other people you meet along the way!bio = This article is taken from the new book by Royane Real titled “How You Can Have All the Friends You Want - Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends and Keeping Friends” If you want to improve your social life, download it today at www.royanereal.com
Do you like making small talk?
Small talk is the name commonly given to the fairly predictable superficial chatter that makes up a large portion of our social encounters.
Neighbors chatting over the fence, strangers speaking to each other in a grocery line, or workers talking at an office party will often engage in the exchange of fairly ritual, routine observations, comments and questions.
Often there is no intent by either party to take the conversation to a deeper level.
Most of the comments and questions tend to be of a fairly trivial sort. For example, a person might say, “I wonder when this heat wave will ever end,” or “That’s a nice dress, where did you get it?”
Other typical small talk dialogue might include basic questions like, “What do you do?” Or “How long have you lived in this neighborhood”?
Small talk often has a bad name. Many people dislike small talk, precisely because it is so mundane and trivial and predictable. It rarely touches on anything important.
It does not lead you deeply into the soul of another. It is conservative and safe. You do not discuss really serious issues like world hunger, or the meaning of life, or the results of a recent scientific breakthrough.
People who are very intellectual or very shy, and those who are socially rebellious, are often unable or unwilling to engage in this sort of chatter, which they consider meaningless and trite.
They long instead to have only intense, meaningful, and soulful exchanges about important matters.
If this is true of you, if you have had nothing but contempt for the very existence of small talk, if you look down with disdain on all who engage in it, it is time to consider revising your opinion.
Small talk, however despicable, however clich?, has an important role to play in initiating, developing, and deepening social connections with other human beings.
Think of small talk as the oil that lubricates the wheels of social interaction. If you see a person regularly, you can use small talk as a way to gradually learn more about each other.
Small talk gives people a low-key, non-threatening way to exchange very basic bits of information with each other.
Through these very tiny, safe, and clich? exchanges that each person offers the other, you can find out what interests you have in common, and whether or not you like the character of the other person.
A complete inability or refusal to engage in small talk can severely limit the overall number of social relationships you develop.
Refusing to engage in some form of small talk will send out the signal that you are not a friendly person, or that you think you are too good to talk with others.
On the other hand, the more often you engage in small talk encounters with others, the more likely it is that you will find people who want to move on to discuss some of the topics that are of more importance to you.
Instead of refusing to play the small talk “game”, why not really make a game out of it? Decide to practice small talk strictly for fun and give yourself points for starting it and keeping it going. Think of small talk as a skill you can develop, and practice working to become better at it. Do it everywhere, and do it often.
Becoming good at small talk will eventually pay off and give you even more opportunities to talk about those things that really matter to you.
You can actually learn to enjoy the light hearted, low key, small talk process, and you may end up liking many of the other people you meet along the way!bio = This article is taken from the new book by Royane Real titled “How You Can Have All the Friends You Want - Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends and Keeping Friends” If you want to improve your social life, download it today at www.royanereal.com
Unlimited Woman
Exceed Your Limits with Women
The success of any encounter with a woman depends on a series of factors, but, undeniably, the most important one is the mental component. A mentally strong person is surrounded by a powerful charisma and will find the dating game a lot easier to play than an insecure person.
Now don’t get nervous. You don’t have to have nerves of steel to score with women. Instead you can learn how to use your nervousness to your advantage and transform it into the fuel needed on the “battlefield”.
“Yeah right,” you say. But what happens when your heart starts pumping like crazy and your voice and hands shake every time you approach a girl?
First of all you should know (know it AND believe it) that it is all in your mind. You are your own worst enemy telling yourself that you can’t do it, that you’re not good enough or that she would never be with someone like you. Instead of sabotaging yourself try to have a more positive attitude. It will make you seem more confident and therefore more attractive.
In order to be successful you have to project self confidence and strength. But how can you pose as a successful man when inside your head there is this voice that keeps telling you that you’re actually a loser? Strength comes from within so there is where it all starts.
Imagine the successful completion of your objective before you approach a woman, or even head out the door. Know exactly what you want to achieve both short term and long term with women.
Set achievable goals.
Ex. I am coming home with one or more women’s phone numbers.
Ex. I am having sex with an attractive woman tonight.
Imagine the whole scenario. Picture the successful completion of your objective then work backwards.
What did you need to do to reach that objective?
Does it mean dressing a little differently?
Ex. If you work in construction all day, maybe you could dress just a bit nicer when you go out to meet women.
Maybe do a search online for great jokes or pick up lines? Women love men that make them laugh.
Plan on a different kind of club than you normally go to? If you are interested in an upscale girl, then the local pub may not provide what you are looking for.
Dating attractive, intelligent women takes planning.
Know what you want, create a strategy and go after her.bio = Caterina Christakos is a published author and dating coach. For more free tips on how to pick up women go to: www.what-women-want.com
The success of any encounter with a woman depends on a series of factors, but, undeniably, the most important one is the mental component. A mentally strong person is surrounded by a powerful charisma and will find the dating game a lot easier to play than an insecure person.
Now don’t get nervous. You don’t have to have nerves of steel to score with women. Instead you can learn how to use your nervousness to your advantage and transform it into the fuel needed on the “battlefield”.
“Yeah right,” you say. But what happens when your heart starts pumping like crazy and your voice and hands shake every time you approach a girl?
First of all you should know (know it AND believe it) that it is all in your mind. You are your own worst enemy telling yourself that you can’t do it, that you’re not good enough or that she would never be with someone like you. Instead of sabotaging yourself try to have a more positive attitude. It will make you seem more confident and therefore more attractive.
In order to be successful you have to project self confidence and strength. But how can you pose as a successful man when inside your head there is this voice that keeps telling you that you’re actually a loser? Strength comes from within so there is where it all starts.
Imagine the successful completion of your objective before you approach a woman, or even head out the door. Know exactly what you want to achieve both short term and long term with women.
Set achievable goals.
Ex. I am coming home with one or more women’s phone numbers.
Ex. I am having sex with an attractive woman tonight.
Imagine the whole scenario. Picture the successful completion of your objective then work backwards.
What did you need to do to reach that objective?
Does it mean dressing a little differently?
Ex. If you work in construction all day, maybe you could dress just a bit nicer when you go out to meet women.
Maybe do a search online for great jokes or pick up lines? Women love men that make them laugh.
Plan on a different kind of club than you normally go to? If you are interested in an upscale girl, then the local pub may not provide what you are looking for.
Dating attractive, intelligent women takes planning.
Know what you want, create a strategy and go after her.bio = Caterina Christakos is a published author and dating coach. For more free tips on how to pick up women go to: www.what-women-want.com
how to have a perfect wedding?
Plan a Beautiful Wedding
It’s probably the most important then a woman’s life, it’s their wedding day. For thousands of years women have dreamed about their weddings ever since they were young girls. They have hope chests where they store special belongings that they hope to use on their wedding day and beyond, day by wedding magazines by the thousands, and they almost religiously follow celebrity weddings as if they were their very own. When that special day comes in a woman’s life there is nothing more important to her than to look beautiful, and feel beautiful. They spend unlimited funds on their wedding dresses, wedding favors, DJs and getting everything for their special day to be just perfect. They don’t want any errors, they want perfection and they plan their entire life for a beautiful day.
There’s no doubt that during your wedding something inevitably will go wrong, and you should prepare for this in advance. I know of one particular wedding party where the photographer forgot what film and his camera and all of the pictures were ruined. Of course that isn’t as much of an issue now with digital cameras, but still you never know when something might go wrong with something as simple as photography. You should plan ahead for things such as these perhaps even giving your guest disposable cameras to take pictures on their own. Just make sure that they dropped the cameras off in a special container whenever they leave your wedding.
Another problem that often happens at weddings is that the bride has a little bit too much to drink beforehand. This can really spell disaster for the entire ceremony if the wedding is really standing at the altar to smashed to even speak. They could also happen that the groom has a little bit too much to drink, or perhaps he’s just feeling queasy from the excitement of the day and he passes out. Don’t be surprised if something serious like this happens during your wedding, but just prepare ahead of time and don’t take yourself too seriously.
The wedding day was made to be beautiful, and the most special day in a woman’s life. Try and relax, take a few deep breaths before stepping out in front of the crowd, and relax. You will have a much more memorable time if you don’t expect perfection and then you are overly upset whenever you don’t achieve perfection. Just enjoy your day, make it special in your own unique way, enjoy the time with friends and family that you may not get to enjoy the time with as much as you should. This will set the stage for a wonderful life with your future husband.
bio - Learn more about vintage wedding dresses and western weddings at http://www.plan4weddings.com
It’s probably the most important then a woman’s life, it’s their wedding day. For thousands of years women have dreamed about their weddings ever since they were young girls. They have hope chests where they store special belongings that they hope to use on their wedding day and beyond, day by wedding magazines by the thousands, and they almost religiously follow celebrity weddings as if they were their very own. When that special day comes in a woman’s life there is nothing more important to her than to look beautiful, and feel beautiful. They spend unlimited funds on their wedding dresses, wedding favors, DJs and getting everything for their special day to be just perfect. They don’t want any errors, they want perfection and they plan their entire life for a beautiful day.
There’s no doubt that during your wedding something inevitably will go wrong, and you should prepare for this in advance. I know of one particular wedding party where the photographer forgot what film and his camera and all of the pictures were ruined. Of course that isn’t as much of an issue now with digital cameras, but still you never know when something might go wrong with something as simple as photography. You should plan ahead for things such as these perhaps even giving your guest disposable cameras to take pictures on their own. Just make sure that they dropped the cameras off in a special container whenever they leave your wedding.
Another problem that often happens at weddings is that the bride has a little bit too much to drink beforehand. This can really spell disaster for the entire ceremony if the wedding is really standing at the altar to smashed to even speak. They could also happen that the groom has a little bit too much to drink, or perhaps he’s just feeling queasy from the excitement of the day and he passes out. Don’t be surprised if something serious like this happens during your wedding, but just prepare ahead of time and don’t take yourself too seriously.
The wedding day was made to be beautiful, and the most special day in a woman’s life. Try and relax, take a few deep breaths before stepping out in front of the crowd, and relax. You will have a much more memorable time if you don’t expect perfection and then you are overly upset whenever you don’t achieve perfection. Just enjoy your day, make it special in your own unique way, enjoy the time with friends and family that you may not get to enjoy the time with as much as you should. This will set the stage for a wonderful life with your future husband.
bio - Learn more about vintage wedding dresses and western weddings at http://www.plan4weddings.com
DATE!!! Online?
Dating Online - The new way to meet people
A lot has changed since the days of matchmaking and escorted evenings out. Dating in the 21st century has taken many turns, among these the emerging popularity of meeting partners online.
Online dating has many benefits. The shy dater can open up and get to know a person without having to deal with first-date jitters that often come from fear of the unknown. By the time he or she meets the potential paramour, they have already established a comfort level that allows the date to flow much more smoothly.
At the other end of the spectrum, social butterflies love online dating because of the number of fish in the sea. With so many people to choose from, booking several dates in a short amount of time is easy. Online dating allows you to be discreet, and it also enables you to be choosy. You choose partners based on common interests gleaned from dating profiles. This is an attractive alternative to approaching a potential mate in a bar going on looks alone.
As the online dating community has grown, so too have the number of vendors willing to help you promote yourself. Professional writers and photographers offer services to assist you with your dating profile. They hawk services to help you attract more hits to your online profile, which obviously helps lead to more dating options.
Dating websites vary. Some require a fee to enjoy certain benefits, such as the ability to post a picture or short video. Other dating sites offer free private e-mail accounts and access to thousands of profiles without paying a dime. When engaging in online dating, however, it is important to exercise caution.
Remember that anyone with Internet access has access to these sites. It is virtually impossible for dating sites to weed out the bad seeds; the online dater must take care in setting up dates with strangers. When first meeting face-to-face, choose a public place. Don’t divulge too much information until you have a good idea of the person’s character. Be careful not to tell too much too soon. With a responsible attitude and an open mind, online dating can be fun, safe, and exciting.
bio = Jeff Lakie is the founder of www.my-free-personals.info and www.my-dating-services.info websites providing information on internet dating
A lot has changed since the days of matchmaking and escorted evenings out. Dating in the 21st century has taken many turns, among these the emerging popularity of meeting partners online.
Online dating has many benefits. The shy dater can open up and get to know a person without having to deal with first-date jitters that often come from fear of the unknown. By the time he or she meets the potential paramour, they have already established a comfort level that allows the date to flow much more smoothly.
At the other end of the spectrum, social butterflies love online dating because of the number of fish in the sea. With so many people to choose from, booking several dates in a short amount of time is easy. Online dating allows you to be discreet, and it also enables you to be choosy. You choose partners based on common interests gleaned from dating profiles. This is an attractive alternative to approaching a potential mate in a bar going on looks alone.
As the online dating community has grown, so too have the number of vendors willing to help you promote yourself. Professional writers and photographers offer services to assist you with your dating profile. They hawk services to help you attract more hits to your online profile, which obviously helps lead to more dating options.
Dating websites vary. Some require a fee to enjoy certain benefits, such as the ability to post a picture or short video. Other dating sites offer free private e-mail accounts and access to thousands of profiles without paying a dime. When engaging in online dating, however, it is important to exercise caution.
Remember that anyone with Internet access has access to these sites. It is virtually impossible for dating sites to weed out the bad seeds; the online dater must take care in setting up dates with strangers. When first meeting face-to-face, choose a public place. Don’t divulge too much information until you have a good idea of the person’s character. Be careful not to tell too much too soon. With a responsible attitude and an open mind, online dating can be fun, safe, and exciting.
bio = Jeff Lakie is the founder of www.my-free-personals.info and www.my-dating-services.info websites providing information on internet dating
Cant go out with girls?
Learn Why She Won’t Go Out With You
Women are unpredictable by nature.
Let’s say that you meet a girl that always smiles at you, always seems happy to see you, has told all her friends about you, but for some reason beyond your power of understanding she just won’t go out with you on a date. If this scenario sounds familiar then you may feel this woman is giving you mixed signals. The problem is: how do you manage the situation?
Believe it or not, women know what they want most of the time. You all just have never been taught the mind reading techniques that we expect you to have. Here are some possible reasons she won’t go out with you:
1) You are her best friend and she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship with a relationship that may not work out. Women analyze relationships to death. A good male friend is worth his weight in gold. We don’t want to lose a fantastic friendship for just another possible relationship.
2) She may think you are the greatest thing since sliced bread but you are not her usual type of guy. Some women love hanging out with nice guys but for some indefinable reason prefer bad boys when they date.
3) A friend of hers really likes you so you are therefore off limits.
4) Many women today have other priorities that are taking first place before relationships. If she is working her way to the top she may not have the time to devote to a relationship.
5) She may really like you but really needs you to make the first move.
Therefore her unique conservation instinct will tell her NOT to date you, while her heart will make her still show interest towards you.
What should you do when something like this happens?
1. Forget all about her for a while and start dating other girls. You will suddenly become a lot more interesting in her eyes because you will appear less available and therefore she will begin to wonder about what she might be missing out on.
2. Try to find out more about her feelings towards you from her friends, while talking about her at the same time. This way there will be an exchange of information and she will learn what you really feel from people she can trust. Yes, it sounds very highschool but if you do it in a subtle way it can be effective.
3. By this time it would be a good idea to try asking her out again. Before doing this plan, everything in such a way that it will surprise her and pull her out of her routines. If you suffer another rejection… it’s time to move on and forget all about her.
bio = Caterina Christakos is a dating coach and author. For your free seduction course go to: www.what-women-want.com
Women are unpredictable by nature.
Let’s say that you meet a girl that always smiles at you, always seems happy to see you, has told all her friends about you, but for some reason beyond your power of understanding she just won’t go out with you on a date. If this scenario sounds familiar then you may feel this woman is giving you mixed signals. The problem is: how do you manage the situation?
Believe it or not, women know what they want most of the time. You all just have never been taught the mind reading techniques that we expect you to have. Here are some possible reasons she won’t go out with you:
1) You are her best friend and she doesn’t want to ruin the friendship with a relationship that may not work out. Women analyze relationships to death. A good male friend is worth his weight in gold. We don’t want to lose a fantastic friendship for just another possible relationship.
2) She may think you are the greatest thing since sliced bread but you are not her usual type of guy. Some women love hanging out with nice guys but for some indefinable reason prefer bad boys when they date.
3) A friend of hers really likes you so you are therefore off limits.
4) Many women today have other priorities that are taking first place before relationships. If she is working her way to the top she may not have the time to devote to a relationship.
5) She may really like you but really needs you to make the first move.
Therefore her unique conservation instinct will tell her NOT to date you, while her heart will make her still show interest towards you.
What should you do when something like this happens?
1. Forget all about her for a while and start dating other girls. You will suddenly become a lot more interesting in her eyes because you will appear less available and therefore she will begin to wonder about what she might be missing out on.
2. Try to find out more about her feelings towards you from her friends, while talking about her at the same time. This way there will be an exchange of information and she will learn what you really feel from people she can trust. Yes, it sounds very highschool but if you do it in a subtle way it can be effective.
3. By this time it would be a good idea to try asking her out again. Before doing this plan, everything in such a way that it will surprise her and pull her out of her routines. If you suffer another rejection… it’s time to move on and forget all about her.
bio = Caterina Christakos is a dating coach and author. For your free seduction course go to: www.what-women-want.com
Soul mate
Still Waiting For Your Soul Mate?
Are you looking for a mate?
If you are currently single and lonely, you may care little for learning techniques to boost your self-esteem or to expand your circle of friends. Your primary concern is how to meet your special soul mate, and soon.
You may be wondering if you need to learn different techniques to find and win a mate than those you would use to meet and make friends. Should you be concentrating your efforts on making friends? Or should all your social efforts be focused on your search for that special someone?
If we have been lonely for a long time, we may dream that our “special someone” will come along and we will never feel lonely again. We may spend a lot of time imagining what our life will be like once we find this special person.
We are sure that we will have a wonderful closeness with this person. That we will never disagree. That all we will ever want to do is to make our partner happy.
People who don’t like themselves think they will be healed when someone else decides to love them. The truth is, if we don’t love and respect ourselves now, we have a very good chance of settling for a mate who won’t love or respect us either.
If we haven’t learned how to get along with the friends we already have and learned to handle being close to them, we won’t know how to get along with and be close to someone just because we have married them.
Have you put your life on hold while you wait to meet your ideal mate? Sometimes very lonely people believe their real life won’t start until they meet and marry their one true love.
This belief is a fallacy. Your real life is going by right now, whether you are married or not. A single life is just as real as married life. An inability to be happy while you are single will most likely continue when you are married.
If you have had trouble developing a sense of identity, or self-esteem, or if you have difficulty expressing your needs and standing up for yourself in your single life, this will not automatically change once you are married.
Successful long-term relationships are built on the foundation of many interpersonal skills, and these skills are developed through practice. In the course of our relationships with other people we learn many important lessons.
We learn about handling disagreements and disappointments, we learn about balancing independence and closeness, how to handle conflict, and how and when to compromise.
These skills are built up in all the many relationships and encounters we have throughout our entire lives, with our relatives, our friends, with acquaintances and strangers.
No matter how wonderfully dazzling a romantic relationship is in the first stages of falling in love, sooner or later you will run into situations where you will have to handle some difficult and painful emotional situations with your partner.
If you have not been able to successfully employ these personal skills in your friendships, you will find it even more difficult to do it in an emotional relationship where your feelings are far more intense, and the stakes are much higher.
There are many valid reasons for continuing to meet new people and make new friends even while you intensely long for a soul mate. After all, you might meet your soul mate as a result of the friends you already have, or those friends you make in the future. The person you fall in love with might be the brother or sister, or college room-mate of someone you already know.
Even if you do meet your “special someone” you will continue to need other friends and social outlets. No matter how happy your relationship is, one person can never meet all of your social needs. You will be renewed and refreshed by having other close friends in your life.bio = This article by Royane Real is taken from her new book “How You Can Have All the Friends You Want - Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends, and Keeping Friends” Sign up for her free newsletter filled with Life Improving tips! www.royanereal.com
Are you looking for a mate?
If you are currently single and lonely, you may care little for learning techniques to boost your self-esteem or to expand your circle of friends. Your primary concern is how to meet your special soul mate, and soon.
You may be wondering if you need to learn different techniques to find and win a mate than those you would use to meet and make friends. Should you be concentrating your efforts on making friends? Or should all your social efforts be focused on your search for that special someone?
If we have been lonely for a long time, we may dream that our “special someone” will come along and we will never feel lonely again. We may spend a lot of time imagining what our life will be like once we find this special person.
We are sure that we will have a wonderful closeness with this person. That we will never disagree. That all we will ever want to do is to make our partner happy.
People who don’t like themselves think they will be healed when someone else decides to love them. The truth is, if we don’t love and respect ourselves now, we have a very good chance of settling for a mate who won’t love or respect us either.
If we haven’t learned how to get along with the friends we already have and learned to handle being close to them, we won’t know how to get along with and be close to someone just because we have married them.
Have you put your life on hold while you wait to meet your ideal mate? Sometimes very lonely people believe their real life won’t start until they meet and marry their one true love.
This belief is a fallacy. Your real life is going by right now, whether you are married or not. A single life is just as real as married life. An inability to be happy while you are single will most likely continue when you are married.
If you have had trouble developing a sense of identity, or self-esteem, or if you have difficulty expressing your needs and standing up for yourself in your single life, this will not automatically change once you are married.
Successful long-term relationships are built on the foundation of many interpersonal skills, and these skills are developed through practice. In the course of our relationships with other people we learn many important lessons.
We learn about handling disagreements and disappointments, we learn about balancing independence and closeness, how to handle conflict, and how and when to compromise.
These skills are built up in all the many relationships and encounters we have throughout our entire lives, with our relatives, our friends, with acquaintances and strangers.
No matter how wonderfully dazzling a romantic relationship is in the first stages of falling in love, sooner or later you will run into situations where you will have to handle some difficult and painful emotional situations with your partner.
If you have not been able to successfully employ these personal skills in your friendships, you will find it even more difficult to do it in an emotional relationship where your feelings are far more intense, and the stakes are much higher.
There are many valid reasons for continuing to meet new people and make new friends even while you intensely long for a soul mate. After all, you might meet your soul mate as a result of the friends you already have, or those friends you make in the future. The person you fall in love with might be the brother or sister, or college room-mate of someone you already know.
Even if you do meet your “special someone” you will continue to need other friends and social outlets. No matter how happy your relationship is, one person can never meet all of your social needs. You will be renewed and refreshed by having other close friends in your life.bio = This article by Royane Real is taken from her new book “How You Can Have All the Friends You Want - Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends, and Keeping Friends” Sign up for her free newsletter filled with Life Improving tips! www.royanereal.com
Friday, November 17, 2006
Age doesnt matter
Be Honest About Your Age
I know it's tempting to lie in your online dating profile and say you're older or younger than reality. Women often claim to be five to ten years younger. Men lie in either direction depending on their dating goal.... Continue.The Dating Weblog - http://www.dating-weblog.com/
I know it's tempting to lie in your online dating profile and say you're older or younger than reality. Women often claim to be five to ten years younger. Men lie in either direction depending on their dating goal.... Continue.The Dating Weblog - http://www.dating-weblog.com/
Dating for Beginners
Online Dating Websites for Beginners
Online dating is a very popular way singles are attempting to find dates and even romance with other like-minded local singles.Find Articles, Free Articles Directory - http://www.articlesbase.com
Online dating is a very popular way singles are attempting to find dates and even romance with other like-minded local singles.Find Articles, Free Articles Directory - http://www.articlesbase.com
Rules of online dating
Britney's Golden Rule To Online Dating
By stereogum A little while back the New York Times explored the topic of dating in the age of MySpace, highlighting the challenges faced for those in failed relationships:But what are the rules? How long are you supposed to wait to change...stereogum - http://www.stereogum.com/
By stereogum A little while back the New York Times explored the topic of dating in the age of MySpace, highlighting the challenges faced for those in failed relationships:But what are the rules? How long are you supposed to wait to change...stereogum - http://www.stereogum.com/
virtual friends
Virtually Best Friends
By Anthony Fernandez While the situation described above might have been common a decade ago, a slew of social networking sites have greatly reduced the anxiety that accompanies the beginning stages of courtship and friendship. ...Blanc & Otus - http://echobase.blancandotus.com/blanc_otus/
By Anthony Fernandez While the situation described above might have been common a decade ago, a slew of social networking sites have greatly reduced the anxiety that accompanies the beginning stages of courtship and friendship. ...Blanc & Otus - http://echobase.blancandotus.com/blanc_otus/
Gay Marriage approved in Africa?
South Africa to Legalize Gay Marriage
"Never again shall a South African be discriminated against on the basis of color, creed, culture, and sex," said a top government official, reacting to the country's legislative approval of gay marriage this week.OneWorld United States - Daily... - http://us.oneworld.net
"Never again shall a South African be discriminated against on the basis of color, creed, culture, and sex," said a top government official, reacting to the country's legislative approval of gay marriage this week.OneWorld United States - Daily... - http://us.oneworld.net
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Salvation from the Slump: How to End Your Dating Drought
by: James Brito
There’s nothing worse than being in a slump. Or so they say. I’ve been there, chances are you’ve been there, and I have a good friend who’s there right now. It’s affected just about every guy, and is the ultimate discouragement in our pursuit of women…if you let it be. For all its negative undertones, being in a slump doesn’t have to be the worst thing ever. There are actually benefits to taking a timeout from girls, and the sooner you see these benefits, the sooner you’ll actually get out of your drought and into the female zone you’re seeking.
The first step out of a slump is to BELIEVE that you’ll get out of the slump. May be harder than it sounds, but believe me, it’s crucial to adopt that mindset. The guys who are quickest to get out of a drought are those who don’t throw a pity party for themselves, who don’t flee back to their ex’s in desperation, and who remain focused on the other parts of their life, the parts that will attract women to them in the first place: work, sports, friends, etc.
My friend Sal is in a slump for the first time in a while. He dated one girl for 5 full years, and now that he finally broke up with her, he doesn’t know what to do. It’s been about a month, which is a lot shorter time period than a lot of guys I know who have been through the same, and he’s already getting cranky, depressed, and tempted to go back to his girlfriend, despite the fact that he knows she’s not right for him. But in situations like his, you have to HOLD YOUR GROUND. Yeah, it blows being in a slump when it seems like no girl is into you. It’s frustrating as hell not getting any love or sex for a long stretch. But you know what? It’s also rewarding, which brings me to my next Slump Salvation tidbit: Use the free time you have with no girlfriend or booty call to improve yourself. Sal doesn’t seem to be doing this. He’s wasting lots of time going online, searching for girls he miiiiight be able to get a date with (I’m no believer in online dating), and groveling over how he can’t seem to get a girl, even when it seems like she’s interested in him. He’s giving women power over his life, making it seem like having one is the sole purpose in life, instead of empowering HIMSELF and going on living with a purpose that isn’t women-related. As I’ve said so many times before, the funny thing about not looking for a girl is that THAT is when you are most likely to get one. So instead of wasting hours on end looking on MySpace or Lavalife or whatever other dating sites you may use, and beating yourself up for being single, get on with your life! Show women that you’re a fun guy, a man in control of his own destiny. The great thing about being single is that you have the time that you wouldn’te when you’re with a girl, to learn new things that generally impress girls: how to cook a great meal, enjoying sports and getting in shape, travelling wherever you want and opening up to new things in life. A lot of guys stop learning, stop opening themselves up when they’re with a girl. They become complacent, oversatisfied, content that now that they’ve found a girlfriend or wife, as if they’ve reached the top of the mountain. Nah. Doesn’t work that way. Having a woman is only one piece of the pie. In fact, when you stop exploring life and committing yourself to new things, that’s when a girl often loses interest. She sees that her boyfriend or husband has settled down and has become boring. Things don’t change, when girls often like change and new things. And often, that’s exactly when a woman leaves a man. The time you have alone is your time of preparation, of becoming an exciting person. I, for example, was definitely not ready 10 years ago for the relationships I have been in over the last five years. I used the time in my teens and early 20’s to build myself up and find out who I was and who I wanted to be. Since I took the time to find MYSELF, to build up my character and personality, it was no wonder that I was subsequently able to find girls, in return. If you’re in a drought, don’t think of it as a bad situation–see it as a good one. You’ve already taken the time to read this column and sort some things out, and that’s an awesome start. Learn everything you can, do everything you have time to do. Remember that there’s probably a good reason you’re single right now; perhaps it was meant to be and it’s your chance to learn more about yourself and what it is you really love. Not every girl is made for every girl–there’s a special girl (or girls) out there just for you, but you have to build up your identity and purpose before you can find her. Once you get a good understanding of your purpose in life and what you want to do with it, you’ll find that you enjoy things more. If your goal is to become a successful business owner who travels the world, use your free time now to determine how you’re going to achieve that goal, and go on doing it. Hunker down to build that business, and use your free time to see the world (you’ll probably meet a girl while travelling). I guarantee you that once you have a path, an understanding of what your life is about, girls will begin to enter your life. You’ll be having so much fun doing what moves you, what fills you up, that you won’t even be searching for women. But as I said before, that’s exactly when they show up. So remember, believe that you’ll get out of the slump, use the time that the slump affords you with, and you’ll go from bust to boon in no time!
About The Author
James Brito, author of "How to Be Irresistible to Women" and "The Art of Impressing Women," regularly explores topics of female attraction. Since 2000, he has helped thousands of men around the world build confidence and get the women they deserve. To get his free six-part audio mini-course, go to: http://www.000relationships.com/ Because it's YOUR turn!
There’s nothing worse than being in a slump. Or so they say. I’ve been there, chances are you’ve been there, and I have a good friend who’s there right now. It’s affected just about every guy, and is the ultimate discouragement in our pursuit of women…if you let it be. For all its negative undertones, being in a slump doesn’t have to be the worst thing ever. There are actually benefits to taking a timeout from girls, and the sooner you see these benefits, the sooner you’ll actually get out of your drought and into the female zone you’re seeking.
The first step out of a slump is to BELIEVE that you’ll get out of the slump. May be harder than it sounds, but believe me, it’s crucial to adopt that mindset. The guys who are quickest to get out of a drought are those who don’t throw a pity party for themselves, who don’t flee back to their ex’s in desperation, and who remain focused on the other parts of their life, the parts that will attract women to them in the first place: work, sports, friends, etc.
My friend Sal is in a slump for the first time in a while. He dated one girl for 5 full years, and now that he finally broke up with her, he doesn’t know what to do. It’s been about a month, which is a lot shorter time period than a lot of guys I know who have been through the same, and he’s already getting cranky, depressed, and tempted to go back to his girlfriend, despite the fact that he knows she’s not right for him. But in situations like his, you have to HOLD YOUR GROUND. Yeah, it blows being in a slump when it seems like no girl is into you. It’s frustrating as hell not getting any love or sex for a long stretch. But you know what? It’s also rewarding, which brings me to my next Slump Salvation tidbit: Use the free time you have with no girlfriend or booty call to improve yourself. Sal doesn’t seem to be doing this. He’s wasting lots of time going online, searching for girls he miiiiight be able to get a date with (I’m no believer in online dating), and groveling over how he can’t seem to get a girl, even when it seems like she’s interested in him. He’s giving women power over his life, making it seem like having one is the sole purpose in life, instead of empowering HIMSELF and going on living with a purpose that isn’t women-related. As I’ve said so many times before, the funny thing about not looking for a girl is that THAT is when you are most likely to get one. So instead of wasting hours on end looking on MySpace or Lavalife or whatever other dating sites you may use, and beating yourself up for being single, get on with your life! Show women that you’re a fun guy, a man in control of his own destiny. The great thing about being single is that you have the time that you wouldn’te when you’re with a girl, to learn new things that generally impress girls: how to cook a great meal, enjoying sports and getting in shape, travelling wherever you want and opening up to new things in life. A lot of guys stop learning, stop opening themselves up when they’re with a girl. They become complacent, oversatisfied, content that now that they’ve found a girlfriend or wife, as if they’ve reached the top of the mountain. Nah. Doesn’t work that way. Having a woman is only one piece of the pie. In fact, when you stop exploring life and committing yourself to new things, that’s when a girl often loses interest. She sees that her boyfriend or husband has settled down and has become boring. Things don’t change, when girls often like change and new things. And often, that’s exactly when a woman leaves a man. The time you have alone is your time of preparation, of becoming an exciting person. I, for example, was definitely not ready 10 years ago for the relationships I have been in over the last five years. I used the time in my teens and early 20’s to build myself up and find out who I was and who I wanted to be. Since I took the time to find MYSELF, to build up my character and personality, it was no wonder that I was subsequently able to find girls, in return. If you’re in a drought, don’t think of it as a bad situation–see it as a good one. You’ve already taken the time to read this column and sort some things out, and that’s an awesome start. Learn everything you can, do everything you have time to do. Remember that there’s probably a good reason you’re single right now; perhaps it was meant to be and it’s your chance to learn more about yourself and what it is you really love. Not every girl is made for every girl–there’s a special girl (or girls) out there just for you, but you have to build up your identity and purpose before you can find her. Once you get a good understanding of your purpose in life and what you want to do with it, you’ll find that you enjoy things more. If your goal is to become a successful business owner who travels the world, use your free time now to determine how you’re going to achieve that goal, and go on doing it. Hunker down to build that business, and use your free time to see the world (you’ll probably meet a girl while travelling). I guarantee you that once you have a path, an understanding of what your life is about, girls will begin to enter your life. You’ll be having so much fun doing what moves you, what fills you up, that you won’t even be searching for women. But as I said before, that’s exactly when they show up. So remember, believe that you’ll get out of the slump, use the time that the slump affords you with, and you’ll go from bust to boon in no time!
About The Author
James Brito, author of "How to Be Irresistible to Women" and "The Art of Impressing Women," regularly explores topics of female attraction. Since 2000, he has helped thousands of men around the world build confidence and get the women they deserve. To get his free six-part audio mini-course, go to: http://www.000relationships.com/ Because it's YOUR turn!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Dating Tips: Flirting Is A Healthy And Fun Way To Approach Someone
by Jeff Wilson
Are you in need of dating tips to help you grab that 'special someone' or perhaps you just need a little extra confidence when approaching the opposite sex. Well there is one little nugget of advice that many dating books overlook and that is about the benefits of flirting.Besides just being a fun and innocent way of addressing a person you are attracted to, flirting can also be an effective method for getting to know a person. But many men and women are not sure how to flirt or what exactly they should be getting out of the act of flirting. We couldn't possibly cover all of the different aspects of how to flirt here in this article, but fortunately we do have three simple tips for you to learn from below:
1. First of all, the fastest way to a person's heart is to find something about the person that you truly like and appreciate, then simply compliment them on it. It could be the clothes they wear or the way they talk. Perhaps it is the way they do their job that attracts you, or how they treat other people. Whatever it is, compliment the person on it.
2. Another way to effectively flirt is to listen to the person. Get her to talk about something that she is very passionate about and then sit back and listen attentively. People just love it when you are into their discussion. In fact, the most powerful aphrodisiac is having your undivided attention.
3. Let's not forget the simplest way to flirt: smiling. Putting on a big smile has been known to communicate many men and women of another person's interest. But be careful, you do not want to give the wrong message to a person you are not interested in, so tone those smiles down to a professional but friendly level if you are not “flirting”!So what are the benefits of flirting? Believe it or not, you can derive many benefits from flirting. Here are a few such positive ways that flirting can help benefit your life.
For one thing, flirting can give your ego a nice boost by easing loneliness. This enables you to interact and meet other people. Also, flirting can in turn help you make new friends. And last but not least, flirting can help you build self confidence.
Are you in need of dating tips to help you grab that 'special someone' or perhaps you just need a little extra confidence when approaching the opposite sex. Well there is one little nugget of advice that many dating books overlook and that is about the benefits of flirting.Besides just being a fun and innocent way of addressing a person you are attracted to, flirting can also be an effective method for getting to know a person. But many men and women are not sure how to flirt or what exactly they should be getting out of the act of flirting. We couldn't possibly cover all of the different aspects of how to flirt here in this article, but fortunately we do have three simple tips for you to learn from below:
1. First of all, the fastest way to a person's heart is to find something about the person that you truly like and appreciate, then simply compliment them on it. It could be the clothes they wear or the way they talk. Perhaps it is the way they do their job that attracts you, or how they treat other people. Whatever it is, compliment the person on it.
2. Another way to effectively flirt is to listen to the person. Get her to talk about something that she is very passionate about and then sit back and listen attentively. People just love it when you are into their discussion. In fact, the most powerful aphrodisiac is having your undivided attention.
3. Let's not forget the simplest way to flirt: smiling. Putting on a big smile has been known to communicate many men and women of another person's interest. But be careful, you do not want to give the wrong message to a person you are not interested in, so tone those smiles down to a professional but friendly level if you are not “flirting”!So what are the benefits of flirting? Believe it or not, you can derive many benefits from flirting. Here are a few such positive ways that flirting can help benefit your life.
For one thing, flirting can give your ego a nice boost by easing loneliness. This enables you to interact and meet other people. Also, flirting can in turn help you make new friends. And last but not least, flirting can help you build self confidence.
Dating Advice: Getting Through the First Date
by Jeff Wilson
A first date! What could be more nerve-wrecking? You’re sizing your date up and your date is sizing you up. You’re both hopeful it will work, but afraid that it won’t. You’re willing to ignore some imperfections, but, honestly, what kind of metrosexual eats French fries with a fork?If this sounds like a description of most of your first dates, this dating advice can help you turn a terrifying experience into a better one.
The first piece of dating advice is to talk to the guy or girl before the date and agree upon what you’re going to do and who will be paying for it. Otherwise, you risk those awkward moments of coming to the door in a killer cocktail dress ready to dine at the best restaurant in town while he shows up wearing shorts and a Burger King t-shirt. It’s also discomfiting when the server sets the check down and it just hangs there in the middle of the table.
Therefore, avoid these minor embarrassments by planning it all out. The second piece of dating advice is to plan an activity that does not require constant interaction. It’s hard enough to find five hours’ worth of conversation when you’re with someone you know; with a stranger, it’s excruciating. So go to a movie, play, or sporting event, or take a sightseeing tour. (Ghost tours are great—they give you a perfect excuse to hide your face in your date’s arm.)
Later, when you’re grasping for conversation subjects, you’ll be able to recap what you did during the first part of the date.Dating Advice: Get Me Out Of HereLet’s be honest, some dates are so bad that they are unsalvageable. Is there any dating advice about cutting them short? Fortunately, yes, you have a couple of options. First, you can pre-arrange for a friend to call you halfway through a first date.
If the evening’s going well, tell your friend you’re having a great time and hang up. If it isn’t, feign a look of concern and say, “Oh, my God, which hospital? I’ll be right there!” Exit stage right.The second option is probably the best: honesty.
Unless you’re dating someone with the sensitivity of a stone, your date is probably just as aware as you are that things aren’t clicking. And like you, there are things he’d probably rather be doing. Be the gutsy one to take the bull by the horns and say, “Look, Dennis, you’re a nice guy, but I’m just not feeling any chemistry here, and you don’t seem to be, either. Let’s call it a night.”First dates can be scary, but with a little dating advice and common sense, you’ll get through them with flying colors.
A first date! What could be more nerve-wrecking? You’re sizing your date up and your date is sizing you up. You’re both hopeful it will work, but afraid that it won’t. You’re willing to ignore some imperfections, but, honestly, what kind of metrosexual eats French fries with a fork?If this sounds like a description of most of your first dates, this dating advice can help you turn a terrifying experience into a better one.
The first piece of dating advice is to talk to the guy or girl before the date and agree upon what you’re going to do and who will be paying for it. Otherwise, you risk those awkward moments of coming to the door in a killer cocktail dress ready to dine at the best restaurant in town while he shows up wearing shorts and a Burger King t-shirt. It’s also discomfiting when the server sets the check down and it just hangs there in the middle of the table.
Therefore, avoid these minor embarrassments by planning it all out. The second piece of dating advice is to plan an activity that does not require constant interaction. It’s hard enough to find five hours’ worth of conversation when you’re with someone you know; with a stranger, it’s excruciating. So go to a movie, play, or sporting event, or take a sightseeing tour. (Ghost tours are great—they give you a perfect excuse to hide your face in your date’s arm.)
Later, when you’re grasping for conversation subjects, you’ll be able to recap what you did during the first part of the date.Dating Advice: Get Me Out Of HereLet’s be honest, some dates are so bad that they are unsalvageable. Is there any dating advice about cutting them short? Fortunately, yes, you have a couple of options. First, you can pre-arrange for a friend to call you halfway through a first date.
If the evening’s going well, tell your friend you’re having a great time and hang up. If it isn’t, feign a look of concern and say, “Oh, my God, which hospital? I’ll be right there!” Exit stage right.The second option is probably the best: honesty.
Unless you’re dating someone with the sensitivity of a stone, your date is probably just as aware as you are that things aren’t clicking. And like you, there are things he’d probably rather be doing. Be the gutsy one to take the bull by the horns and say, “Look, Dennis, you’re a nice guy, but I’m just not feeling any chemistry here, and you don’t seem to be, either. Let’s call it a night.”First dates can be scary, but with a little dating advice and common sense, you’ll get through them with flying colors.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Adult Dating Sites, Done Just Right, Are Great
by: Morgan Hamilton
Dating is a lot easier back when I was still young. But now that I‘ve gotten older and have more responsibilities than before, I find that I don’t have enough time to spend on socializing with people my age. Is your situation the same as mine? If it is, then you might want to try adult dating sites. We use to meet people through our friends and acquaintances but now that we don’t have the luxury of time, dating sites on the Internet gives us a new way of interacting with people for fun, friendship and romantic purposes.
Dating is a lot easier back when I was still young. But now that I‘ve gotten older and have more responsibilities than before, I find that I don’t have enough time to spend on socializing with people my age. Is your situation the same as mine? If it is, then you might want to try adult dating sites. We use to meet people through our friends and acquaintances but now that we don’t have the luxury of time, dating sites on the Internet gives us a new way of interacting with people for fun, friendship and romantic purposes.
Adult dating sites makes finding singles near your place more convenient, giving you more opportunities to find potential partners for intimate relationships. Most sites have features that let you browse through a gallery of local guys and gals, allowing you to choose your type.
Send a few messages to those you like and you may find individuals who are looking for the same kind of relationship. It’s also possible to find all types of ethnicity, nationality, religion, marital status, and age group. Adult dating sites gives you all the freedom you want to choose who you want to connect with. Finding prospective partners through online adult dating sites is quite simple. All you have to do is make a good profile by posting your best picture and adding a few interesting details about yourself on the Internet. You can then wait for emails from other singles who found you appealing. If you want to a more aggressive approach, you can contact those you find pleasing yourself. All of which can be done easily through your PC at the comfort of your room. You don’t have to seek out the local hotspots to find other singles, you can have a pleasant conversation with your new found friends through online dating sites.
Today’s technology allows you to mingle in many different ways. Adult dating sites enable you to socialize with people through txt messages or chartrooms. You can even communicate through voice chats, making it possible for you to hear your friend’s lovely voice. If you want to spice up your life, adult dating sites will give you just that. No matter how busy you may be finding interesting friends is now convenient and easy.
About The Author
Morgan Hamilton offers expert advice and great tips regarding all aspects concerning dating. Get more information by visiting http://www.singlesanddatinginfo.com/singles--dating/singles--dating/adult-dating-sites-done-just-right-are-great.html
Morgan Hamilton offers expert advice and great tips regarding all aspects concerning dating. Get more information by visiting http://www.singlesanddatinginfo.com/singles--dating/singles--dating/adult-dating-sites-done-just-right-are-great.html
Monday, November 13, 2006
Inexpensive Dating Ideas
by: Jeffrey Strain
Dating and saving money. For many, the two concepts don't equate. There's an automatic reaction for most when suggesting the two together that the person paying is trying to be "cheap" and the resulting date will naturally have the same feel. Contrary to popular belief, however, dating doesn't have to be expensive to be fun, entertaining and memorable. It doesn't even have to take a whole lot of extra preparation time.
What it does take is a little imagination and breaking from the typical date routine. You have to be willing to think beyond dinner and a movie and be willing to try something new for a change. Here are 15 inexpensive dating ideas: 10 for anyone plus 5 for the adventurous.
Natural Scenery: The beauty of nature is all around us and it doesn't cost a dime. Whether it's a trip to the beach, a walk in the forest or a search into a cave, it can be done together for practically nothing. Take the time to find the natural scenic spots in your area and utilize them for your dates.
Sports: If you and your date are both athletic, sport activities together can be a great way to spend your time. Play a set of tennis, jog in the park, toss a Frisbee about, play catch with a baseball or football or shoot some baskets. Whichever you choose, you can spend quality time at minimal cost and get some exercise in, too.
Picnic: Picnics are great for dates because they can be taken along wherever you plan to go for the day and they cost a fraction of going out for a meal. They also can be made as casual or as romantic as you want. Take a casual picnic meal, add some cheese & wine along with a red rose and the picnic instantly takes on a romantic feel.
Historic Places & Buildings: It seems the only time people go looking at the historic landmarks near where they live is when visitors come from out of town. Many of these historic or culturally significant spots have no or small entrance fees and make a great place to go on a date. You also get to learn more about the area you live.
Meal/Evening At Home: Cook up a meal at home and spend the evening watching movies or some other activity such as a board game. The meal most likely will be better than at a restaurant and the evening will cost a fraction of what going out to dinner and a movie would cost. Cook the meal together to spend even more time together, or do it yourself as a special surprise.
Memory Album: Take your camera or purchase an inexpensive disposable camera and make a day of taking photos together. Make a theme for the day if you want or just take any crazy photo that comes to mind. Once finished, get the photos 1 hour processed and create a memory album together for the day that will live on forever.
Museums: If you have museums in your area, they can be an excellent place to enjoy an inexpensive date. Admission prices are usually reasonable and often they have discounts for those attending a number of events over the year.
Learn A New Skill: Gather some information on a skill you always wanted to learn and spend a day practicing it together. It could be a day of learning card tricks, learning how to juggle or learning to make bird calls. Any skill you have always wanted to try can make a fun and interesting date.
College Events: If you live near a college or university, utilize their resources for your dates. Guest lectures, music recitals, art exhibitions and plays are common and are often free of charge. The quality can be excellent and the variety enormous.
Hobby Together: you can set a regularly scheduled date if the two of you have a hobby you both enjoy. You can look in the local community newsletter to see if there are classes being offered in something that interests both of you. These classes are usually quite inexpensive and the two of you can enjoy a few hours each week together learning something new.
For those who are looking for an inexpensive date with some adventure involved, here are five more options that are sure to make the evening memorable:
Local Thrift Shop Date: Plan a date someplace where there are a lot of people. Before going, head down to the local thrift shop together. Once there, specify a small amount of money to purchase clothing or accessories for the other and both head off in different directions. The goal is to find items the other has to wear for the rest of the day/evening within the price specified. The entertainment is seeing the reaction from all the people who see your new outfit as you wander the crowded area.
Follow Them Date: As the two of you meet, you look around and pick somebody out on the street. The date is to follow that person where ever he or she goes. Once that person has stopped or you can no longer follow them, pick another person to follow. Your bound to have loads of laughs as you attempt to stay with your designated guide.
Scavenger Hunt Date: When your date arrives, have him or her make a list of what he or she considers to be 20 unusual items. Once the list is made, the date will be to try and find as many of those items as possible.
Truth Or Dare Date: Pick some spots in your area to visit, but play truth or dare along the way. It doesn't really matter where you go since the entertainment is doing the various dares that the other gives in addition to telling all the truths.
Bag Of Dates: Put each of the dates I just mentioned, plus any others that you come up with, onto a separate sheet of paper and place them in a bag. When your date comes to the door, have him or her reach inside and choose a piece of paper. Whichever one is chosen is your date for the day/evening.
Copyright (c) 2004, by Jeffrey Strain
This article may be freely distributed so long as the copyright, author's information and an active link (where possible) are included.
A complimentary copy of any newsletter or a link to the site where the article is posted would be greatly appreciated.
About The Author
Jeffrey Strain has published hundreds of money saving articles and the creator of the Daily Money Saving Challenge Program. He is the co-owner of http://www.savingadvice.com -- a website dedicated to saving you money. savingadvice@gmail.com
Dating and saving money. For many, the two concepts don't equate. There's an automatic reaction for most when suggesting the two together that the person paying is trying to be "cheap" and the resulting date will naturally have the same feel. Contrary to popular belief, however, dating doesn't have to be expensive to be fun, entertaining and memorable. It doesn't even have to take a whole lot of extra preparation time.
What it does take is a little imagination and breaking from the typical date routine. You have to be willing to think beyond dinner and a movie and be willing to try something new for a change. Here are 15 inexpensive dating ideas: 10 for anyone plus 5 for the adventurous.
Natural Scenery: The beauty of nature is all around us and it doesn't cost a dime. Whether it's a trip to the beach, a walk in the forest or a search into a cave, it can be done together for practically nothing. Take the time to find the natural scenic spots in your area and utilize them for your dates.
Sports: If you and your date are both athletic, sport activities together can be a great way to spend your time. Play a set of tennis, jog in the park, toss a Frisbee about, play catch with a baseball or football or shoot some baskets. Whichever you choose, you can spend quality time at minimal cost and get some exercise in, too.
Picnic: Picnics are great for dates because they can be taken along wherever you plan to go for the day and they cost a fraction of going out for a meal. They also can be made as casual or as romantic as you want. Take a casual picnic meal, add some cheese & wine along with a red rose and the picnic instantly takes on a romantic feel.
Historic Places & Buildings: It seems the only time people go looking at the historic landmarks near where they live is when visitors come from out of town. Many of these historic or culturally significant spots have no or small entrance fees and make a great place to go on a date. You also get to learn more about the area you live.
Meal/Evening At Home: Cook up a meal at home and spend the evening watching movies or some other activity such as a board game. The meal most likely will be better than at a restaurant and the evening will cost a fraction of what going out to dinner and a movie would cost. Cook the meal together to spend even more time together, or do it yourself as a special surprise.
Memory Album: Take your camera or purchase an inexpensive disposable camera and make a day of taking photos together. Make a theme for the day if you want or just take any crazy photo that comes to mind. Once finished, get the photos 1 hour processed and create a memory album together for the day that will live on forever.
Museums: If you have museums in your area, they can be an excellent place to enjoy an inexpensive date. Admission prices are usually reasonable and often they have discounts for those attending a number of events over the year.
Learn A New Skill: Gather some information on a skill you always wanted to learn and spend a day practicing it together. It could be a day of learning card tricks, learning how to juggle or learning to make bird calls. Any skill you have always wanted to try can make a fun and interesting date.
College Events: If you live near a college or university, utilize their resources for your dates. Guest lectures, music recitals, art exhibitions and plays are common and are often free of charge. The quality can be excellent and the variety enormous.
Hobby Together: you can set a regularly scheduled date if the two of you have a hobby you both enjoy. You can look in the local community newsletter to see if there are classes being offered in something that interests both of you. These classes are usually quite inexpensive and the two of you can enjoy a few hours each week together learning something new.
For those who are looking for an inexpensive date with some adventure involved, here are five more options that are sure to make the evening memorable:
Local Thrift Shop Date: Plan a date someplace where there are a lot of people. Before going, head down to the local thrift shop together. Once there, specify a small amount of money to purchase clothing or accessories for the other and both head off in different directions. The goal is to find items the other has to wear for the rest of the day/evening within the price specified. The entertainment is seeing the reaction from all the people who see your new outfit as you wander the crowded area.
Follow Them Date: As the two of you meet, you look around and pick somebody out on the street. The date is to follow that person where ever he or she goes. Once that person has stopped or you can no longer follow them, pick another person to follow. Your bound to have loads of laughs as you attempt to stay with your designated guide.
Scavenger Hunt Date: When your date arrives, have him or her make a list of what he or she considers to be 20 unusual items. Once the list is made, the date will be to try and find as many of those items as possible.
Truth Or Dare Date: Pick some spots in your area to visit, but play truth or dare along the way. It doesn't really matter where you go since the entertainment is doing the various dares that the other gives in addition to telling all the truths.
Bag Of Dates: Put each of the dates I just mentioned, plus any others that you come up with, onto a separate sheet of paper and place them in a bag. When your date comes to the door, have him or her reach inside and choose a piece of paper. Whichever one is chosen is your date for the day/evening.
Copyright (c) 2004, by Jeffrey Strain
This article may be freely distributed so long as the copyright, author's information and an active link (where possible) are included.
A complimentary copy of any newsletter or a link to the site where the article is posted would be greatly appreciated.
About The Author
Jeffrey Strain has published hundreds of money saving articles and the creator of the Daily Money Saving Challenge Program. He is the co-owner of http://www.savingadvice.com -- a website dedicated to saving you money. savingadvice@gmail.com
Choosing the Best Dating Site for You
by: David Kamau
Choosing the right dating site can be daunting. For one, there are thousands of dating and matchmaking sites on the web. Two, each including popular dating sites, is tailored to meet specific needs or objectives. Three, what's good for one person is not necessarily good (or right) for another. So, how do you find the best dating site for you? Here are some pointers to help narrow the field and make it easier for you to make the right choice.
1. Know what you are looking for. Are you seeking a serious or casual relationship? If seeking a serious relationship, go to a site that caters to that. If seeking encounters or casual relationships, you'll be wasting time if you sign up with serious relationship sites.
2. Know yourself. This is related to point No. 1 above. What things are meaningful to you? What are your passions or hobbies? Know these could help in deciding the type of site best suited for your particular needs (see point No. 5).
3. Ask a friend who has done it: This option may not be the best simply because a friend will likely recommend what is right for her/him, which may not be necessarily so for you. But a friend may tell about good or bad experiences with certain website(s). Caution: if the friend had a bad personal online dating experience or for any reason never succeeded she/he might take the chance to vent, and tell you just how it won't work. Personal experiences are exactly that, personal.
4. Do some good old research: Do a search on your favorite search engine using keywords such as "dating sites", "internet dating sites", "dating site reviews", "online dating websites", "online personals" etc. Not the best way if you are short of time as you may have to weed through hundreds of sites one by one. Reading objective reviews about various dating sites will help farther narrow the field.
5. Which is best, specialty (aka niche) or popular dating site? One more reason you should know what you want. Is religion important to you? Or is ethnicity? What about age? Do you have kids or do you want someone with kids? What about your hobbies/passions? There are specialty and community-based dating sites to cater for almost every need, interest, value or passion (examples: single parents, Asian, catholic, bicycle lovers, military etc).
6. How long has the site been existent? Obviously, a new site will not have that many enough members, or most members will be on trial. Conversely, an older site will have established a large database.
Also, that a site has been around for a couple of years or more means it probably is doing something right.
7. Features: Look for sites which offer onsite instant messaging, anonymous email, photo profiles, chat/video chat and other handy features. How do you tell what features are offered without first becoming a paid member? See No.10 below.
8. Sign up with more than one site. The very first site you sign up with may not be best suited for you. Therefore it is important to sign up with three or more to get a feel (see No.10 below on how to do this without first having to pay).
9. Establish a budget. Decide how much you are willing to spend, but be realistic. Free or cheap websites may not provide you with quality service or features. Some websites charge a recurring fee, others a one-time fee, while still others charge by services used.
10. Sign up for free trials: Almost all the popular dating sites offer a free trial period. A free trial allows you to test-drive the site without committing. Never sign up with a site that has no free trial. Free trials differ from site to site. Some sites offer full-featured free trials for a limited time, others offer limited features for a longer or indefinite period and others something in-between.
About The Author
David Kamau is webmaster of: http://www.e-datecentral.com, which reviews dating sites. Find top-rate dating and matchmaking sites with free trials at: http://e-datecentral.com/personals/free_trials.htm
Choosing the right dating site can be daunting. For one, there are thousands of dating and matchmaking sites on the web. Two, each including popular dating sites, is tailored to meet specific needs or objectives. Three, what's good for one person is not necessarily good (or right) for another. So, how do you find the best dating site for you? Here are some pointers to help narrow the field and make it easier for you to make the right choice.
1. Know what you are looking for. Are you seeking a serious or casual relationship? If seeking a serious relationship, go to a site that caters to that. If seeking encounters or casual relationships, you'll be wasting time if you sign up with serious relationship sites.
2. Know yourself. This is related to point No. 1 above. What things are meaningful to you? What are your passions or hobbies? Know these could help in deciding the type of site best suited for your particular needs (see point No. 5).
3. Ask a friend who has done it: This option may not be the best simply because a friend will likely recommend what is right for her/him, which may not be necessarily so for you. But a friend may tell about good or bad experiences with certain website(s). Caution: if the friend had a bad personal online dating experience or for any reason never succeeded she/he might take the chance to vent, and tell you just how it won't work. Personal experiences are exactly that, personal.
4. Do some good old research: Do a search on your favorite search engine using keywords such as "dating sites", "internet dating sites", "dating site reviews", "online dating websites", "online personals" etc. Not the best way if you are short of time as you may have to weed through hundreds of sites one by one. Reading objective reviews about various dating sites will help farther narrow the field.
5. Which is best, specialty (aka niche) or popular dating site? One more reason you should know what you want. Is religion important to you? Or is ethnicity? What about age? Do you have kids or do you want someone with kids? What about your hobbies/passions? There are specialty and community-based dating sites to cater for almost every need, interest, value or passion (examples: single parents, Asian, catholic, bicycle lovers, military etc).
6. How long has the site been existent? Obviously, a new site will not have that many enough members, or most members will be on trial. Conversely, an older site will have established a large database.
Also, that a site has been around for a couple of years or more means it probably is doing something right.
7. Features: Look for sites which offer onsite instant messaging, anonymous email, photo profiles, chat/video chat and other handy features. How do you tell what features are offered without first becoming a paid member? See No.10 below.
8. Sign up with more than one site. The very first site you sign up with may not be best suited for you. Therefore it is important to sign up with three or more to get a feel (see No.10 below on how to do this without first having to pay).
9. Establish a budget. Decide how much you are willing to spend, but be realistic. Free or cheap websites may not provide you with quality service or features. Some websites charge a recurring fee, others a one-time fee, while still others charge by services used.
10. Sign up for free trials: Almost all the popular dating sites offer a free trial period. A free trial allows you to test-drive the site without committing. Never sign up with a site that has no free trial. Free trials differ from site to site. Some sites offer full-featured free trials for a limited time, others offer limited features for a longer or indefinite period and others something in-between.
About The Author
David Kamau is webmaster of: http://www.e-datecentral.com, which reviews dating sites. Find top-rate dating and matchmaking sites with free trials at: http://e-datecentral.com/personals/free_trials.htm
Dating – Amazing Techniques To Attract a Mate of Your Dreams Online
by: Pradeep Aggarwal
Dating - Amazing Techniques To Attract a Mate of Your Dreams Online When we start thinking about online dating, the most frequently asked questions are “How do I create a love relationship? How do I attract a man or a woman online for a night, a lifetime or anything in between? People say that they are waiting for the person that they can love, but we would like you to self reflect and ask yourself the question that if you need to pick up anything heavy, do you wait for the muscles to develop?
There are simple tools of communication for creating lasting love. One of the many tools is self-assessment or self-analysis. You can do a sort of course correction to attract a better partner before starting dating, try to upgrade your inner self, change yourself to attract a person of higher value. Course correction is like an airplane, which flies in a certain direction, but the wind pushes it in a different direction so the pilot is constantly trying to course correct.
There are people who complain that they keep attracting bimbos or gold diggers who are just mentally ill. One should stop and think why they are attracting the wrong kind of person. It is worthwhile to learn certain tools, which will make you, understand people better and help you to change yourself, help you to attract a better partner for dating online. The other important tool to attract the ideal woman or man is body language or tonality or pacing of the voice. It is important to read the signals that are being sent to you.
The first and foremost advice we would like to give a man who is dating online is to first establish trust in a woman, let her settle in her feminity. Never talk about sex on the first day. Never view the woman as a target, something to be had or accomplished. Try to read her profile, read her messages, and ask her questions.
There are also women who test a man about how he talks about his mother or about his last girlfriend. You can say something beautiful about them to her but you need not fake it. For attracting a woman online, we should communicate in an authentic manner. Most of us do not reveal our authentic self because we are self conscious or scared. Usually a man wants a woman who is gracious, a woman who is not cutting down another woman or man. Now, how does a woman attract a quality man through online dating? Again it is essential that she communicate about herself online in the right way.
Dating - Amazing Techniques To Attract a Mate of Your Dreams Online When we start thinking about online dating, the most frequently asked questions are “How do I create a love relationship? How do I attract a man or a woman online for a night, a lifetime or anything in between? People say that they are waiting for the person that they can love, but we would like you to self reflect and ask yourself the question that if you need to pick up anything heavy, do you wait for the muscles to develop?
There are simple tools of communication for creating lasting love. One of the many tools is self-assessment or self-analysis. You can do a sort of course correction to attract a better partner before starting dating, try to upgrade your inner self, change yourself to attract a person of higher value. Course correction is like an airplane, which flies in a certain direction, but the wind pushes it in a different direction so the pilot is constantly trying to course correct.
There are people who complain that they keep attracting bimbos or gold diggers who are just mentally ill. One should stop and think why they are attracting the wrong kind of person. It is worthwhile to learn certain tools, which will make you, understand people better and help you to change yourself, help you to attract a better partner for dating online. The other important tool to attract the ideal woman or man is body language or tonality or pacing of the voice. It is important to read the signals that are being sent to you.
The first and foremost advice we would like to give a man who is dating online is to first establish trust in a woman, let her settle in her feminity. Never talk about sex on the first day. Never view the woman as a target, something to be had or accomplished. Try to read her profile, read her messages, and ask her questions.
There are also women who test a man about how he talks about his mother or about his last girlfriend. You can say something beautiful about them to her but you need not fake it. For attracting a woman online, we should communicate in an authentic manner. Most of us do not reveal our authentic self because we are self conscious or scared. Usually a man wants a woman who is gracious, a woman who is not cutting down another woman or man. Now, how does a woman attract a quality man through online dating? Again it is essential that she communicate about herself online in the right way.
The signals that attract a man are I am whole, I am complete and I am not needy. The signals that scare a man away are I am confused or I am incompetent. A man does not want a dependent or a child. He needs a confident woman. The woman is taught by someone, somewhere (parents or movies) that they should not show all their strengths. They should hide their emotions or they will scare a quality man away. If a person does not respond to your profile in online dating or does not call you back you should be grateful. It means that he is not resonating or responding to your authentic self. He is probably searching for someone who not so confident, someone whom they can manipulate.
There is a saying that a woman can fake an orgasm but men can fake a whole relationship. We should try to communicate our positive selves in online dating, who we want to be and when we communicate that people start responding to that person. So to attract a person of your dreams on online dating, it is important to master these tools to be successful. Discover The Secrets That will Boost your confidence and charisma enabling you to get almost any woman within 5 minutes… http://www.datingtantra.com/hypnodate/
About The Author
Pradeep Aggarwal is the creator of dating tantra (http://www.datingtantra.com). The website offers tips, techniques, tricks, resources to make your dating experience a success. Visit dating tantra for a free 6 part mini course “Sure Fire ways to amazing dates”
Pradeep Aggarwal is the creator of dating tantra (http://www.datingtantra.com). The website offers tips, techniques, tricks, resources to make your dating experience a success. Visit dating tantra for a free 6 part mini course “Sure Fire ways to amazing dates”
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